The Voice Saying "Pay Attention Girlfriend!"

best friends It’s really easy to not only turn a blind eye to red flags when we’re dating someone, but then also not mention them to our friends, who would be objective and point out some home truths to us.

How many times has Mandi said to me, “You didn’t tell me THAT!”

That Little Voice in Our Heads

Even so, we usually have this niggling little voice in our heads that pops up at odd moments to point out those troublesome signs we don’t want to acknowledge. Eventually, we reach a point in a relationship where we know things aren’t right, we’re getting upset and worried, but think we don’t know why. In reality, our subconscious knows perfectly well and is screaming to be listened to.

Is He Really Interested?

I know this happens a lot, because I see the search terms people use when they find this site. So many, mostly women, are trying to figure out if he’s really interested, why he doesn’t call back, what if he lost the phone number or email address, what if he says he’s busy, could he be cheating…1,700 variations of this theme, every month.

How do we deal with our own minds at this point?

Become Your Own Best Friend

What has worked for me is to step outside myself…pretend I’m a friend and am giving advice to someone else in this same situation. It’s amazing how much more realistic (and cynical) I am when I can become objective.

A good reminder of what’s not acceptable is Mandi’s article: No Excuses – Stop Justifying Behavior of Men Who Aren’t Interested! Reading articles like that and then applying them objectively to yourself can make that  “What the hell was I thinking” moment arrive much more quickly, which means avoiding a lot of pain and heartache down the road.

Sometimes our posts on this blog must seem very cynical. The thing is, when things aren’t good in a relationship and we’re having a hard time admitting it, we often need a smack upside the head that says, “Pay attention, Girlfriend!”

Written by dazzled

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