When Guys Don’t Seem Interested in Dating You

image Sometimes, my dating life seems more desolate than the Mojave Desert. It can feel like I am the last single person on the planet. What causes these droughts in our dating lives? Is it El Niño? Global Warming? Do I need to be more fuel efficient and green in my social life?

If you are going through a “dating dry spell” have you stopped to consider what kind of signals you are giving out?

Girls Just Want to Have Fun

I recently became reacquainted with a good friend from a few years ago. I had forgotten how much fun it is to go out with her. One thing that I remembered right away was how we always met the most interesting people.

This got me thinking. Why is it when I am out with her, I meet interesting and fun people, and have a great time, but not always with my other friends. Yes, we always have fun, but it never seemed like there was anyone NEW around.

Are You Sending Out the Wrong Signals?

There are a few things you can look for and avoid or try if you are feeling like you aren’t meeting anyone, on or offline.

  1. Herd Mentality – Are you always with a group? It’s very hard to approach a stranger, much harder when they are surrounded by friends. While I admire a guy that has the courage to wade through the many guys I hang out with, I have a feeling there area few who just weren’t sure. Also, if you are out with members of the opposite sex, it’s an easy for others to assume there is a relationship in place.
  2. In a Rut – Just like the wagons heading west, we too can end up in a rut. Are you always going to the same place? When’s the last time you went somewhere just because you have never been there before?
  3. Anti Social Branding – Sometimes, when we are in a slump, it’s our mind and body’s way of taking a break to heal, relax and recharge. Forcing yourself out before you are ready can cause subtle signs that others will pick up, and instinctually avoid.
    1. Do you like being around other people? If you aren’t in a mood to socialize, it will show. It’s ok to need a break from the crowd.
    2. Do strangers freak you out? While we here at Successful Online Dating ALWAYS advise caution when meeting someone new, regardless of where that occurs, if the thought of talking to a stranger makes you turn tail and run, you are probably showing that in body language. If you aren’t comfortable, people won’t be comfortable around you.
  4. Blinders On – Have you been out of the game awhile? Apparently I went through a year long phase where I was COMPLETELY oblivious to anyone who showed the slightest interest in me. I would complain that I got no attention (yes, I do love attention) and my friends would say “but that guy was hitting on you.” If you are missing the signals coming your way, you’ll miss out on a lot.
  5. Gun Shy – If your last experience in the dating Rodeo ended with a fall, you might be scared to get back out there. While it’s ok to be nervous, if you are shaking like a leaf, you might need more time. Unlike horses, it’s not always the best policy to get right back out there.

Ready to Date Again

So many things come into play when we talk about the subtle signals we send. Stop, and think about how you really feel about dating. Are you really ready to get out there again? While you had your downtime, did you develop habits that are hampering your success now?

Think about how you act even doing something as simple as grocery shopping. If you are ready to get back out on the range and search for those greener pastures, chin up, be positive and look for the FUN in life.

Written by Mandi

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3 Responses to “When Guys Don’t Seem Interested in Dating You”

  1. [...] – When I talked about the subtle signals that we can give of that turn men off, this was a key factor. If you don’t look approachable, why [...]

  2. [...] – When I talked about the subtle signals that we can give of that turn men off, this was a key factor. If you don’t look approachable, why [...]

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